The Bear Story

An atheist was taking a walk through the woods. What majestic trees!
What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river he heard a rustling in the bushes
behind him. He turned to look and saw a 7-foot grizzly charging towards
him. He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder and
saw that the bear was closing in on him. He looked over his shoulder again,
and the bear was even closer.

He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but
saw the bear right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and
raising his right paw to strike him. At that instant the atheist cried out:
"Oh my God!..."

Time stopped.

The bear froze.

The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky: "You
deny my existence for all of these years, teach others I don't exist, and
even credit creation to a cosmic accident. Do you expect me to help you out
of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"

The atheist looked directly into the light, "It would be hypocritical of
me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps could you
make the BEAR a Christian?"

"Very well," said the voice.

The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. The bear dropped
his right paw, sat back on his haunches, brought both paws together, bowed
his head and spoke:

"Lord, bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty ...
thru Christ our Lord... Amen."